Don’t Think

200 words :: Jude Law/Ewan McGregor :: 5/6/06
It’s not what he wants, but Jude takes what he can get.

This is why he doesn’t do this, Jude remembers when it’s too late. He doesn’t get this drunk with Ewan because this always happens.

The first time, Ewan had his hand down Jude’s pants and his mouth at Jude’s ear, saying, “It’s okay. We have an open relationship, she doesn’t mind,” and that’s not what Jude wanted at all.

He knows what he wants isn’t ever going to happen; he gave up on that ages ago. He knows it’ll never happen, so he takes what he can get. He takes it when Ewan’s drunk and offering and he’s had enough himself that it doesn’t seem to matter anymore. He takes it the second the door slams shut in another hastily-hired hotel room, dropping to his knees and sucking Ewan’s cock down like he can’t get enough. He takes it up the arse and never tells Ewan he’d rather be doing the fucking.

It happens so often he sometimes wonders if he gets pissed like this on purpose, but he doesn’t want to think about that. Instead he goes home to his own house and his own family and in the morning pretends he wouldn’t rather be waking up with Ewan.